Expectations

Currently residing in England,
Mmm Good old English grubb

had to pop by London to see my friend’s very successful play at The Royal Court. She graduated the same year as me, and her first piece of writing got put up at one of London’s most famous and historic playhouses..! Not a word changed, all her work, got published, she was a big part of the casting and workshopping of it, and it sold out outrageously fast.
Amazing. And it has of course launched her in to a promising career. She is very talented, clearly in more fields than just acting.
 So proud.
I had a lot of talented people in my year, and I’m sure that I will soon hear more great news from someone else. Meanwhile I am riding a roller coaster of events, a year of craziness and unexpected turns, and more than anything, surprises.
In just a few days I am to go to Oslo, to rehearse a song with an orchestra, that I am to perform on TV the next day, with choreography, dancers, fancy dress and all eyes on me. My hotel room is paid for and it is to be a jolly good experience.
It happened in december, I was at work for the local TV station, and as I was wrapping up a rather weird interview, I was surrounded by cameras and realised I had been set up, or ‘Punked’ as seen on TV. It had been set up by my boss, mother, sister, TV2 and it was all a lark… I totally freaked out and they gave me the news that I was going to have the joy of singing with Hans Aaseth and his orchestra… Always wanted to sing with a big band. And that wish was about to come true… on primetime TV. Wow.

Months and months has passed by, and it still doesn’t seem real, but the reality of it is creeping up and I am getting rather nervous. The fact that the whole of Norway is about to see me exposed WITH my family, talking about rather sore subjects, me being filmed on hidden cameras, me having no idea of what I was saying or how I reacted, and no power to take part of the editing, and then to try and showcase my talent in two minutes in a song that I didn’t really choose.
GOD, do NOT mistake me… I am not complaining, I am simply worried, and of course, hoping that this could possibly lead to something, for instance, my hometown realise that I exist and maybe I would get a summer-job in one of those really well paid shows that stars the same people year after year, so I don’t have to scrape earnings as a waitress..? Therefore, pressure is ON, and I do want to leave the show with dignity having justified everything, lived up to my own standards, earned the honour I got, and made a good lasting impression. Being unwell and having a cold therefore is not a good standpoint, have been feeling the same way for three days now, not worse or better, so I am worried that status quo will remain the same… Cross your fingers for me. Pray for me to get better and to climb up that stage like Bambi in high heels, singing one of the most famous songs in the world that was song by the most beautiful woman that ever lived, clumsily answering questions in front of an audience and cameras…

Oh god… It’s gonna be fine it’s gonna be fine it’s gonna be fine…

1 Comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s